JoAnne

should i ?

2006-10-23T16:10:00.000+08:00

nth to write here...feel like closing it down...
what do you think?
should i?

2006-06-30T15:53:00.000+08:00

yesterday i juz finish my mid-year exams. exams are never easy, this time was no exception too. haven't been having enough sleep lately coz too anxious over exams le, almost every night got nightmare, how to have good sleep? anyway i am juz too tired to think about my exams. what is done, is done, so be it. yesterday after my last paper went j8 with vivien. erm, can i say it was fun going out with her? ya actually it was, coz she's such a good entertainer with all her funny comments, or isit coz its too easy to make me laugh?

anyway, going to j8 juz reminds me about wad happened last fri and sat. though there was little talking, its still beautiful to have spend time with you. i wonder if u think so too? but i guess not. after all who are we? we are juz frenz, juz like u always tell me.

you are someone i can never fathom. never can i understand why you do the things that you do. but i will try to find the reason why.

sometimes i wonder if life will be better if i have never met you. i wonder if things will be less complicated if there was only her in your world. after all life is unpredictable. maybe if i did not appear she will not feel that way too. sometimes i really wish i can read ur mind, but i cant. because i am not observant not sensitive enough to things.

sometimes i wish that i have already disappeared from your world but u asked me, 'you dont want me as ur fren?' does it mean you want me to stay? but at times i fear u will jus leave my world without telling me. and when i know it, you are far beyond my reach, no where to be found. at times, i feel as if u have forgotten me
, ignoring me. to leave or not to? to fear ur disappearance or to accept it? what am i to do? tell me!

this morning i thought i remembered you ask me out for movie, but only to realise later that it was all true, only in my dreams. if time could turn back, i would have followed my intuition, i would not have rejected your offer. how stupid i was. isit the fear in me that was hindering me? i guess so. if i could i really wished i was the person there, with you, quietly listening to you telling me how unhappy you were. but time, will never undo itself.

sometimes i dunno why i do the things i do. so i hope u ll understand. but as if you will understand. you dont even know i have this blog. you dont even have this url. wad can i expect? NOTHING!!!

note: if you dont understand what i have posted, its ok, coz i typed it all for myself to read, not for you. if u get it, so be it.

frendz

2006-03-17T10:13:00.000+08:00

ok, its like really long time ago when i last posted an entry here, it was during pae's o1, now is the march holidays so erm, i decided to update my blog, coz i realised vivien likes to visit my blog, so i think its time for me to undate it, then it wont bored her to death. anyway m posted back to nyjc! hey its a great place, with great environment, great teachers and most importantly WONDERFUL pple.oh u noe who i mean right? our STUDY CLUB pple rox...erm...tt really tu name was given by mingshi, so i think we juz gotta bear with it a few more days before we meet up next mon in school to create a blog, a space, a group, e-mail add...and blah blah blah tt we can think of for our group... ooooo go check it out man sometime when you are free...
erm, o2 is coming, do i sound excited over it? NO! dont ask me why, i juz dont like this kind of stuff, they juz make me feel like ponning school onli....anyway...i'm stuck with my new ct...and all my old ct pple who are still in the same class as me are all ogls....erh...so i regret not handing up my ogl form... but anyway tts besides my point... the point tt i wanna make is that our study club is being separated!!!! i wanna go find the principal..... haiz... mingshi is in 0615, vivien and jie ling, 0628... me?..... 0630... oh wat a NICE arrangement... anyway i think i should be greatful to have shuning, sihui and joleen in my class (pple dont laugh at me k...u noe wat m refering to...)ok...i think m freek over pizzas so... m looking forward to the pizza nite during o2....but i reall resent tt level camp...which aims to get you out of ur comfort zone and make u do things....and i perdict them to be really horrible things... but aniway...i will jux close both eyes and go through it juz like wat i have always been doing when i go attend things i dont wanna go... erm...reason being... i want tt cert lah....
o...now listening to jj's jian.jian.dan.dan.... orh....so nice....isit singing wat i m feeling now? i dunno... but i think jovina thinks m really too numb to things liao so cannot feel any pain....erm...or should i say..mayb i do feel some pain... but in front of hy and him...i juz choose not to feel anything...i choose to be the strong character... hmm....i dunno....or mayb coz my protective shells are too thick liao...so cannot feel anything...or isit wat mr tong calls it....emotion leporsy.... i dunno... anyway... ll u care wat it is..i guess no ba... anyway i dont think u even noe i have got a blog... hey i got dis blog like for almost a year but the no. of pple who knows tt i have got a blog is really few... but anyway...tts gd too....
erm... think its time for me to go liao... i got loads of work to do! i shall continue some other time...
but i juz wanna say.. WE ARE GOING TO STAND STRONG N CONTINUE TO BE FRIENDS NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS! [luv u pple(all my frends)]

frendz

2006-03-17T09:40:00.000+08:00

nYjc

2006-01-05T08:16:00.000+08:00

its been a very very long time since i last posted my entry.u noe y?i was waiting for the reopening of school, coz then,i will have things to write about.reopening of school began with a big BANG at NYJC,it was the 'o'1. erm...'o'1 was fun!!! we played games,eg,water games,land games,soccer,and some other really inovative games. then there was the cheering part,i am in DRAGON house,so i had to cheer the DRAGON cheer.anyway,yesterday...the DRAGON and PHONIX house formed an allence....so we had the 'long-feng' cheer...i tot it was rather funny...it goes somthing like this...
hey long-feng, hey long-feng
long-feng hey, long-feng ho, go long-feng....
it soounded rather funny coz the chinese words dont fit well into the english cheer.
besides this,we also had cheers that goes around SA-ring people, like one, had 9 or 11 Sa...then there was also some cheer where we used to jeer at the griffins and pegasus...eg, the LOSER cheer. next, this is something i MUST HIGHLIGHT,the NY canteen food is so damnit delicious,so much times BETTER then our sucky sacss food where we ate until we almost puke.by the time the os came, the sight of all the sacss canteen food could juz make us puke blood. now getting to eat the NY food, i tot i will not suffer for the next 2 to 3 months....haha...
lastly, i must say, NYJC is no chi-na school, all i can say, its a very balanced school, and good in almost everything else. at first i tot the NY pple must be very shy shy one....but then..they proved me WRONG, they were all so full of energy, live and so dynamic....esp their OGLs and councel pple.they all put in 101% of effort to entertain us on the first day when we were all so not entu at all....i think theor effort did paid off...i think, coming to NYJC for my first 3 months, was NO MISTAKE!!!

2005-09-30T20:29:00.000+08:00

yes, i got back all my results liao... ... erm.... i did make a improvement of 3 points....from a 19 to..... ____(i leave it to u to do the maths...)....but i think God is very fair....i can further get rid of another 4 points... but even so...., where can i go with tt points... i wish i can go tj or nyj.... or even tp(temasek poly) the mass com...... i think tt course is very fun...very interesting.... ;P....
anyway...i dont think i still can accept the fact tt i top lit(e) in my class....
i mean i so lan de ren.....how can i lor.....anyway i dint really understood the poem....when i did it.....yet can still get _____(i shall not tell you).... i think, i really must learn tt God's grace is enough for me.....i must trust in him... :P
(still working hard for 'o's....)

sian

2005-09-19T11:46:00.000+08:00

hey....i love this new blogskin......
its so beautiful.....like me.....
tml is my last prelim paper.......
grad nite coming.........
hey i got nth to rite lah...
so not interesting lor....
sorry....

help me!

2005-08-26T20:20:00.000+08:00

i dont think amyone will understand how i am feeling now.... its a kind of frustration, a kind of dislike....maybe....even hate......i dunno..... sometimes i ask God, y, y dont you make me a perfect person.....but i know....i know deep down within my heart, his love and grace over me has always been more than enough for me...but i juz cant control myself to not ask this qns.....maybe....he was jus being fair to everyone......
Y, Y ,Y, am i so lan in all my subjects....my english, higher chinese, e and a maths, tripple science, humanities....all sux to the core.....and dis mon...i have a full string of prelims exams......oh.....how how how am i going to improve in such a short time......if i had the power to freeze time, i would.....
btw....i should be studying my higher chinese....yet i am typing here........erh......wat am i doing?
if i could cry, juz let me cry.....let me feel that you are beside me....giving me all the power and strength i need...jus let me see that i am of some use......i dont wanna feel so useless and helpless......
jovina has always been telling me....not to hate myself coz u made me......but i cannot control myself........oh.....jus tell me wat i am supposed to do..... (want to cry, but no tears coming out)
lord.....plz help me....!!! (esp 'o's.....)

_-+^joanne^+-_

2005-06-24T09:00:00.000+08:00

ok....i was asked by my friend to update my blog, and so, im doind it now...
currently,i am listening to this really nice song from 'love at dolphin bay' sonud track, lend to me by my cousin. hey its damn it nice.oh...btw, if u wanna noe, i am eating my breakfact while writing this. actually, i am kinda sick of this thing, coz i cannot write them in chinese. if i could, my blog will be a rather sad one, but coz since im writing in english, i dont wanna write all those things down. writing blog in english, i think lacks lots of feelings, emotions, passion, anf that very special feel that you can onli find in writing in chinese...see, tts y my blog is always so boring..hahaha...
hmm...i was juz thinking, is it very funny of me to have a blog and still keep a diary....? (arh....there you go again....another very nice song *snow*)
oh yes....juz asking...anyone free on the 16 or 17 of july?...wanna go watch ahs cds play at i dunno where place? if u want, tell me k...can leave me a message in blog of me or call me or msg my hp. k thanks....
hey, i juz realized tt this is ,my longest blog entery man...WOW!
haiz...school is going to reopen in no time...i still have lots of hw to finish...DIE!
hey, m going to stop here for the time being, if u read my blog until veri sian liao. tell me k...then i will go update...(haha, sorri, m a very absentminded person...*laughs*)

pissed

2005-06-02T10:54:00.000+08:00

i really got pissed off....i actually typed a damn it nice blog entry in chinese....then.....when i publisd it.....i goes all messed up....and no matter wat i do, i does not change the state my entry is in!!!

他的, 单恋

2005-06-02T10:42:00.000+08:00

我不停的问我自己,为什麽,为什麽,他竞可以对一个根本就不会喜欢上他的女生(我)付出他的一切.
我有什麽好,值得你这样的好?
你曾说过,单恋是你自愿的,那我宁愿你不是自愿的.我也有单恋过,那是痛苦,苦涩的滋味.站在朋友的立场上,我希望这单恋不是你自愿的,因为,不想你爱得这样痛苦.我相信,你我都心知肚明,这样的单恋,结果是什麽.
我们就做普通朋友好吗?
我愿你在不久的将来,找到你想要,你可望的幸福.
愿我们的友谊长存.

2005-06-02T10:40:00.000+08:00

他的, 单恋

2005-06-02T10:14:00.000+08:00

cold

2005-05-27T13:59:00.000+08:00

i admit, i am a COLD person....i dont exactly like to confide in pple...i am not open to every other person...but is tt wrong? IS BEING COLD REALLY A SIN? sometimes i feel tt if i amyself dont even understand myself, how are you, not being me, understand me? to me, i think that people who are cold, usu emotionless one the outside, are peole with great depths. isit true? i have oso heard my kor(1st) said that people who appear reall nice to get along with, are actually people who are very isolation very loney.oso, i read from somewhere that people who wear black are people who wants to be low profiled, but yet still badly wants others to know them.
am i one of these people? maybe coz, m a gemini, so....i got split personality...
should i remain as who i am now? or should i change to be a open, cheerful person?
i dunno....oh...tell me the answer....
(how i am feeling now, no one can understand!)

True Love?

2005-05-17T01:03:00.000+08:00

Wat is true love? forget the cork and bull story about love. what being happy for the other ex-partner and all. about them having a happy life while u live your old miserable spinster in that lil' ol cottage.. true love is when u see two old people.. still holding hands.. still appreciating each other's beauty..that is really true love however cliche it may sound.

JoAnne

should i ?

frendz

frendz

nYjc

sian

help me!

_-+*^joanne^*+-_

pissed

他的, 单恋

他的, 单恋

cold

True Love?

_-+^joanne^+-_